There is a disclaimer on the inside cover of my EP:
Please keep in mind that some of the songs on this EP are not about how
we are supposed to be,
Rather, they are about how we often are.The main reason (although there are other reasons) for this disclaimer is the first song,
The title track of the project,
"Pour".
The verses are the main problem.
They tell of duplicity,
Of trying to act like everything's okay
When, really, it feels like the entire world's falling apart.
This is not how we are supposed to be.
Honestly, though, it is how we are.
The refrain and the bridge tell of something else,
Of learning to accept the hard things because they can help us depend more on God,
Draw us closer to Him.
Honestly, I'm not sure why I wrote it this way.
Maybe it's because this is the way it sometimes has to be.
Maybe we need to learn to accept the hard things as gift
Before we can learn to tell others of the pain in our hearts.
Maybe understanding that it's an opportunity to draw closer to God
Has to come before understanding that it's an opportunity to trust in others.
Maybe we just can't do it in our own strength.
Maybe the strength to live transparently has to come from Him.
It isn't the way we're supposed to be,
But maybe it's one way we can learn.
I'm proud of this song,
In spite of the fact that it tells of how we are not supposed to be,
Or maybe because of that fact,
Maybe because of the honesty,
And it came out so well,
Accompaniment gently tinkling,
Words speaking of learning to trust,
Learning to draw close,
Even in the hurt.
Pour
On the outside I am trying to pretend that I'm okay.
On the inside I am screaming. God, please make it go away.
On the outside I am trying to pretend I understand.
On the inside I am fighting to remember there's a plan.
On the outside rain is falling and I'm standing here alone.
On the inside You are calling, “I will not let you go.”
So let it pour,
Let it pour.
Pull me closer than I've ever been before.
Let it pour,
Just let it pour.
I wanna be closer than I've ever been before.
On the outside I am trying to pretend I like the rain.
On the inside I am crying. Help me make it through this pain.
On the outside I am trying to pretend I'm well-informed.
On the inside I am fighting to hear You over the storm.
On the outside falling water is melting solid land.
On the inside, somewhere deep down, I know I am in Your hands.
So let it pour,
Let it pour.
Pull me closer than I've ever been before.
Let it pour,
Just let it pour.
I wanna be closer than I've ever been before.
You are God.
You're big enough
To hold my fears,
To hold my tears.
I'm so small,
Still You let me fall
Into Your arms,
Your loving arms.
You are God.
You're big enough
To hold me up,
You hold me up.
I'm so small,
Still, when I fall,
You lift me up,
You lift me up.
You are God.
You love me and
You have a plan,
You have a plan.
I'm so small,
Still You said
You'd help me stand,
You help me stand.
So let it pour,
Let it pour.
Pull me closer than I've ever been before.
Let it pour,
Just let it pour.
I wanna be closer than I've ever been before.
So let it pour,
Let it pour.
Pull me closer than I've ever been before.
Let it pour,
Just let it pour.
I wanna be closer than I've ever been before.
You are God.
You are God.
You are God,
So let it pour.
You are God.
You are God.
You are God,
So let it pour.
Let it pour.
I wanna be closer
To You.
You said, “I will not let you go.”
Closer, closer
To You.
On the outside I am trying to pretend that I'm okay.
The bold, italicized words are the lyrics to the song "Pour" by Mary Schieferstein, ©2010 Mary Schieferstein.
This post contains the "Artist's Notes" for a song from the EP Pour: Songs of Rain and Rivers. To view the artist's thoughts about other tracks on this EP, use the links below.
1. Pour
2. With Me
3. River Flow
4. Peace Like A River
5. Still Holding Me
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