Chasing the Wind

I was up late again last night,

Which finally gave me something interesting to blog about.

(Speaking of which, I'm on my second glass of iced tea!)

I'd spent the day surrounded by music . . .

And written words and videos related to music.

I'd been looking up the lyrics to the song I had stuck in my head,

(Still have stuck in my head, as a matter of fact,)

Watching videos about how the band members had changed and grown over the years,

Then I felt like watching The Ultimate Gift,

As much for the music as for the story.

Then, of course, after watching The Ultimate Gift, I had to watch the music video of one of my favorite songs,

Which I then proceeded to sing continuously as I walked through the house,

Turning off equipment and sliding the movie back into its proper place.

Then, of course, it was late,

And so I went to take my shower,

Thinking about music . . .

And pianos . . .

Specifically, an acoustic grand piano . . .

And it was more like fantasizing . . .

If I happened to see an acoustic grand piano, I would want to play it.

If it was sitting there unused,

Just waiting for someone to come,

I would have to play it.

I would sit down and start to press the keys,

Gently, then growing louder,

A melody of eighth notes . . .

And then there would be words . . .

If this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went . . .

'Cause the only way to find real wonder is
By chasing the wind.

Before long, I was sitting on the floor in my room,

Composition book open on my lap,

Turning out phrases,

Writing the words,

Pouring out my emotions about all the difficulties I've been having -

How she doesn't want me to be doing this,

How he's supportive but still thinks I'm not quite good enough at what I'm doing.

Pouring out my feelings about how I can't stop doing this,

How I enjoy doing this,

How I'll never regret doing this.

Never.

Before long, I had a song . . .

Or at least a rough draft of one.

Chasing the Wind

I show her my work
And she just calls it “fine”,
Says the word without
Even meeting my eye.
She pretends to be supportive,
But I can read between the lines.
She doesn't really want
Me to have this in my life.

Maybe she's right,
But I know I can't quit.
Something in me needs
To see this through to the end,

And if this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went,
And if it all amounts to nothing,
I'll still call it a gift,
For I have learned that in my failures
I find I am truly blessed,
And that the only way to live the wonder is
By chasing the wind.

He shows me the ropes,
Helps me learn what to do,
Spends hours with me working,
Faithful, loyal, and true,
Tells people all the famous names
That he compares me to,
Yet still says that in some things
I do not have a clue.

I know he's right,
There is so much I don't know,
But I will keep trying
'Cause I cannot let this go,

And if this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went,
And if it all amounts to nothing,
I'll still call it a gift,
For I have learned that in my failures
I find I am truly blessed,
And that the only way to live the wonder is
By chasing the wind.

Chasing the wind.

I've been searching for the answers.
There is one I've found so far:
You cannot help but use your gifts
Once you discover what they are.

So if this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went,
And if it all amounts to nothing,
I'll still call it a gift,
For I have learned that in my failures
I find I am truly blessed.

If this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went;
If it all amounts to nothing,
I'll still call it a gift,
For I have learned that in my failures
I find I am truly blessed,
And that the only way to live the wonder is
By chasing the wind.

Chasing the wind.

The only way to live the wonder is
By chasing the wind.

I put my composition book on my keyboard,

Slightly askew,

And went back to getting ready for bed,

Tired,

Worn out,

After all, it was well after midnight by the time I finished.

Still, I didn't really mind.

I love to do this,

To sit and write,

To put the words together,

Write the phrases.

I love to play

And sing

And just

Make

Music.

If this road leads to nowhere,
I'll still be glad I went;
If it all amounts to nothing,
I'll still call it a gift,
For I have learned that in my failures
I find I am truly blessed,
And that the only way to live the wonder is
By chasing the wind. 


The bold, italicized words are the lyrics to the song "Chasing the Wind" by Mary Schieferstein, ©2011 Mary Schieferstein.