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"No matter where I am, your teachings fill me with songs." - Psalm 119:54 (CEV)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

What Comes Down . . .


The needle comes up,

Pokes through fabric in the middle of a white-outlined square,

Presses down into another square nearby.

Up, down.

Up, down.

This - this is how my life has felt lately.

 
Monday -

Monday was good.

I listened to a sermon during lunch,

One of those where the pastor describes where you are

(Not to at "T", but close enough for it to hit you.)

I wanted to know more,

How I could find my way out of this.

I listened to the next two sermons in the series,

Spent most of the rest of the day pursuing God.

I started to want Him again,

Really want Him.

By the time I was getting ready for bed,

My prayers were filled with praises,

So many praises that I could have kept praising Him all night.

I didn't.

I should have.

  
I tried to hold onto that the next day,

Sought it again today,

Failed both times.

Why does this have to happen so often?

Why can't I just want Him all the time?

There are probably many answers to that question,

Most of which I will never know.

The only one I can think of is that,

If I wanted Him that much all the time,

I wouldn't know what it's like to not want Him,

How precious it is to feel that burning desire for Him,

To want to seek after Him with all I am.

I often feel the weight of things most strongly when they are absent.

Still, that's not much of a comfort.


The needle comes up again,

Form starting to take shape.

First, it was just a couple of random stitches,

Then more,

Then subtle variations in color.

I can see it coming into focus,

This half-formed lobster.

A couple stitches of white,

Two dark eyes,

Outlines,

And then it will finally, definitively appear to be what it was intended to be -

Whole,

Beautiful,

Complete.


I think He does this with us, too,

Putting the stitches into place one at a time,

Piercing the fabric,

Needle moving up, down.

It's slow,

Painfully slow,

But that work He started - 

He always carries it on to completion.

I know this.

At least, in my head, I know this.

In my heart, I do not -

Not as well as I should.


I plunge the needle back into the fabric,

Trying to remind myself,

For the thousandth time,

That His work defies the law of gravity:

What comes down,

Must come up.

 
Numbers 1107-1242 this week,

Seeing who He is,

Remembering that He is Faithful,

Worthy,

God.
  1. He gives those whom He chooses victory wherever they go (2 Samuel 8:14)
  2. He does what is good in His sight (2 Samuel 10:12)
  3. He is displeased by people's actions (2 Samuel 11:27)
  4. He does things in broad daylight (2 Samuel 12:12)
  5. He does things before all the people (2 Samuel 12:12)
  6. He takes away sin (2 Samuel 12:13)
  7. He loves people (2 Samuel 12:24)
  8. He names people “Loved by the LORD” (2 Samuel 12:25)
  9. He devises ways so that a banished person does not remain banished from Him (2 Samuel 15:15)
  10. He brings back those who find favor in His eyes (2 Samuel 15:25)
  11. He allows those who find favor in His eyes to see His dwelling place again (2 Samuel 15:25)
  12. He tells people to curse (2 Samuel 16:11)
  13. He vindicates (2 Samuel 18:31)
  14. He delivers His servant from all who rise up against him (2 Samuel 18:31)
  15. He sends famines (2 Samuel 21:1)
  16. He answers prayer (2 Samuel 21:14)
  17. He answers prayer in behalf of the land (2 Samuel 21:14)
  18. He delivers those He chooses from the hands of all their enemies (2 Samuel 22:1)
  19. He is a Fortress (2 Samuel 22:2)
  20. He is a Deliverer (2 Samuel 22:2)
  21. He is a Refuge (2 Samuel 22:3)
  22. He is the Horn of Salvation (2 Samuel 22:3)
  23. He is a Stronghold (2 Samuel 22:3)
  24. He saves His people from violent people (2 Samuel 22:3)
  25. He is Worthy of Praise (2 Samuel 22:4)
  26. He saves His people from their enemies (2 Samuel 22:4)
  27. He hears the voice of the distressed (2 Samuel 22:7)
  28. From His temple He hears those who call out to Him (2 Samuel 22:7)
  29. The cries of His people come to His ears (2 Samuel 22:7)
  30. His anger causes the earth to tremble and quake (2 Samuel 22:8)
  31. His anger shakes the foundations of the heavens (2 Samuel 22:8)
  32. Smoke rises from His nostrils (2 Samuel 22:9)
  33. Consuming fire comes from His mouth (2 Samuel 22:9)
  34. Burning coals blaze out of His mouth (2 Samuel 22:9)
  35. He parts the heavens (2 Samuel 22:10)
  36. He comes down (2 Samuel 22:10)
  37. Dark clouds are under His feet (2 Samuel 22:10)
  38. He mounts cherubim (2 Samuel 22:11)
  39. He flies (2 Samuel 22:11)
  40. He soars on the wings of the wind (2 Samuel 22:11)
  41. He makes darkness His canopy around Him (2 Samuel 22:12)
  42. Bolts of lightning blaze forth out of the brightness of His presence (2 Samuel 22:13)
  43. He thunders from Heaven (2 Samuel 22:14)
  44. His voice resounds (2 Samuel 22:14)
  45. He shoots arrows (2 Samuel 22:15)
  46. He scatters the enemy (2 Samuel 22:15)
  47. He routes the enemy with great bolts of lightning (2 Samuel 22:15)
  48. He exposes the valleys of the sea (2 Samuel 22:16)
  49. He lays bare the foundations of the earth (2 Samuel 22:16)
  50. At His rebuke, the valleys of the sea are exposed and the foundations of the earth are lad bare (2 Samuel 22:16)
  51. At the blast of breath from His nostrils, the valleys of the sea are exposed and the foundations of the earth are lad bare (2 Samuel 22:16)
  52. He reaches down from on high (2 Samuel 22:17)
  53. He takes hold of His people (2 Samuel 22:17)
  54. He draws His people out of deep waters (2 Samuel 22:17)
  55. He rescues His people from their powerful enemies (2 Samuel 22:18)
  56. He rescues His people from their foes, who are too strong for them (2 Samuel 22:18)
  57. He is a Support (2 Samuel 22:19)
  58. He supports His people in the day of their disaster (2 Samuel 22:19)
  59. He supports His people when they are confronted by their enemies (2 Samuel 22:18-19)
  60. He brings His people out into a spacious place (2 Samuel 22:20)
  61. He rescues His people because He delights in them (2 Samuel 22:20)
  62. He deals with His people according to their righteousness (2 Samuel 22:21)
  63. He rewards His people according to the cleanness of their hands (2 Samuel 22:21)
  64. He rewards His people according to their righteousness (2 Samuel 22:25)
  65. He rewards His people according to their cleanness in His sight (2 Samuel 22:25)
  66. To the faithful He shows Himself Faithful (2 Samuel 22:26)
  67. He is Blameless (2 Samuel 22:26)
  68. To the blameless He shows Himself Blameless (2 Samuel 22:26)
  69. He is Pure (2 Samuel 22:27)
  70. To the pure He shows Himself Pure (2 Samuel 22:27)
  71. He is Shrewd (2 Samuel 22:27)
  72. To the devious He shows Himself Shrewd (2 Samuel 22:27)
  73. He saves the humble (2 Samuel 22:28)
  74. His eyes are on the haughty to bring them low (2 Samuel 22:28)
  75. He is the lamp of His people (2 Samuel 22:29)
  76. He turns the darkness of His people into light (2 Samuel 22:29)
  77. With His help, His people can advance against troops (2 Samuel 22:30)
  78. With His help, His people can scale walls (2 Samuel 22:30)
  79. His way is perfect (2 Samuel 22:31)
  80. His word is flawless (2 Samuel 22:31)
  81. He shields all who take refuge in Him (2 Samuel 22:31)
  82. None is God besides Him (2 Samuel 22:32)
  83. None is the Rock except Him (2 Samuel 22:32)
  84. He arms His people with strength (2 Samuel 22:33)
  85. He keeps His people's way secure (2 Samuel 22:33)
  86. He makes the feet of His people like the feet of deer (2 Samuel 22:34)
  87. He causes His people to stand on the heights (2 Samuel 22:34)
  88. He trains the hands of His people for battle (2 Samuel 22:35)
  89. He gives His people the strength to bend bows of bronze (2 Samuel 22:35)
  90. His saving help is the shield of His people (2 Samuel 22:36)
  91. His help makes His people great (2 Samuel 22:36)
  92. He provides a broad path for the feet of His people (2 Samuel 22:37)
  93. He keeps the ankles of His people from giving way (2 Samuel 22:37)
  94. He arms His people with strength for battle (2 Samuel 22:40)
  95. He humbles His people's adversaries before them (2 Samuel 22:40)
  96. He makes the enemies of His people turn their backs in flight (2 Samuel 22:41)
  97. He does not answer the enemies of His people when they cry out to Him for help (2 Samuel 22:41-42)
  98. He delivers His people from the attacks of the peoples (2 Samuel 22:44)
  99. He preserves His chosen one as the head of nations (2 Samuel 22:44)
  100. He lives! (2 Samuel 22:47)
  101. He is to be praised! (2 Samuel 22:47)
  102. He is to be exalted! (2 Samuel 22:47)
  103. He avenges His people (2 Samuel 22:48)
  104. He puts the nations under the one He has chosen (2 Samuel 22:48)
  105. He sets His people free from His enemies (2 Samuel 22:49)
  106. He exalts His people above their foes (2 Samuel 22:49)
  107. He rescues the one He has chosen from a violent man (2 Samuel 22:49)
  108. He is to be praised among the nations (2 Samuel 22:50)
  109. His people sing the praises of His name (2 Samuel 22:50)
  110. He gives His king great victories (2 Samuel 22:51)
  111. He shows unfailing kindness to His anointed (2 Samuel 22:51)
  112. He shows unfailing kindness to the ones He has chosen forever (2 Samuel 22:51)
  113. He exalts those whom He chooses to exalt (2 Samuel 23:1)
  114. He is the God of Jacob (2 Samuel 23:1)
  115. He anoints those whom He chooses to anoint (2 Samuel 23:1)
  116. His Spirit speaks through people (2 Samuel 23:2)
  117. His puts His word on the tongues of me (2 Samuel 23:2)
  118. He speaks to men (2 Samuel 23:3)
  119. He makes those who rule in righteousness, who rule in fear of Him, like the light of morning at sunrise on a cloudless morning (2 Samuel 23:4)
  120. He makes those who rule in righteousness, who rule in fear of Him, like the brightness after rain that brings grass from the earth (2 Samuel 23:4)\
  121. He makes an everlasting covenant with those whose house is right with Him (2 Samuel 23:5)
  122. His covenants are arranged and secured in every part (2 Samuel 23:5)
  123. He brings fruition to the salvation of those whose house is right with Him (2 Samuel 23:5)
  124. He grants every desire of those whose house is right with Him (2 Samuel 23:5)
  125. He casts evil men aside like thorns (2 Samuel 23:6)
  126. He brings about great victories (2 Samuel 23:12)
  127. His anger burns against Israel (2 Samuel 24:1)
  128. He incites people against Israel (2 Samuel 24:1)
  129. He gives options (2 Samuel 24:12)
  130. His Mercy is great (2 Samuel 24:14)
  131. He keeps Jerusalem from destruction (2 Samuel 24:16)
  132. He relents concerning the disaster He has planned (2 Samuel 24:26)
  133. He commands the angels (2 Samuel 24:16)
  134. He commands the angels to stop afflicting the people (2 Samuel 24:16)
  135. He answers the prayers of His servant on behalf of the land (2 Samuel 24:25)
  136. He stops plagues (2 Samuel 24:25)


Counting 10,000 Reasons to worship Him:


<a href="http://maryschieferstein.blogspot.com/search/label/10000%20Reasons" target="_blank"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8zkGH23srZ8/T2i3Bun0O9I/AAAAAAAABSw/8giPvnJmCPI/s320/10000ReasonsButton.jpg" /></a>
Counting in community:

2 comments:

Christina said...

This is so true! I appreciate your honesty. Have you ever read Larry Crabb? He talks about similar issues. Loved your list! So thankful for all we have in Christ.

Mary said...

Oh, thank you, Christina! I'm glad you appreciate my honesty. I must say, I logged on to post and was hoping and praying that I wouldn't have comments, because I keep thinking about the fact that this is about the thousandth time I've posted about being in a dry spot and people are actually going to read what I've written. I try to be honest regardless, but I have to confess that a part of me still worries about what other people will think. So, thank you very, very much for your encouragement. It means a lot.

No, I have never read Larry Crabb. I looked him up, though, and read where he had said, "If I ever publish my autobiography, I’ll call it Sovereign Stumbling. My life journey to date is a series of how I have stumbled and how God has consistently guided me in His sovereign ways." That definitely sounds similar to what I've been going through lately. I'll have to see if I can find any of his works. Thanks for the recommendation!

Oh, the list. Such a help, especially now. I find myself just skimming and reading whatever I can in it, trying to remind myself who He is. So thankful, but not thankful enough. Never thankful enough.

Thank you so much for your words. They really do mean a lot.

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